:)

2012-01-17T22:29:00.007+08:00

*

Tu Tu Kueh. TTK TTK TTK TTK TTK.

*

If you must drive, drive safe!

*

Draft from 5/7/11:

When she woke up crying from one of her nightmares, the Kolker would stay with her, brush her hair with his hands, collect her tears in thimbles for her to drink the next morning (The only way to overcome sadness is to consume it, he said), and more than that: once her eyes closed and she fell back sleep, he was left to bear the insomnia. There was a complete transfer, like a speeding billiard ball colliding with a resting one. Should Brod feel depressed - she was always depressed - the Kolker would sit with her until he could convince her that it's OK. It is. Really. And when she would move on with her day, he would stay behind, paralyzed with a grief he coulldn't name and that wasn't his.

*

He felt no pain, they told her. He felt nothing, really . Which made her cry more, and harder. Death is the only thing in life that you absolutely have to be aware as it's happening.

*

But he also knew that there is an inflationary aspect to love, and that should his mother, or Rose, or any of those who loved him find out about each other, they would not be able to help but feel of lesser value. He knew that I love you also means I love you more than anyone loves you, or has loved you, or will love you, and also, I love you in a way that no one loves you or has loved you, or will love you , and also, I love you in a way that I love no one else, and never have loved anyone else, and never will love anyone else. He knew that it is, by love's definition, impossible to love two people.

*

THE PROBLEM OF EVIL: WHY UNCONDITIONALLY BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO UNCONDITIONALLY GOOD PEOPLE.
They never do.

*

The more you love someone, he came to think, the harder it is to tell them. it surprised him that strangers didn't stop each other on the street to say I love you.

*
The house that your great-great-great-grandmother and I moved into when we first became married looked out onto the small falls, at the end of the Jewish/Human fault line. It had wood floors, long windows, and enough room for a large family. It was a handsome house. A good house.

But the water, your great-great-great-grandmother said, I can't hear myself think.

Time, I urged her. Give it time.

And let me tell you, while the house was unreasonably humid, and the front lawn perpetual mud from the spray, while the walls needed to be repapered every six months, and chips of paint fell from the ceiling like snow for all seasons, what they say about people who live next to waterfalls is true.

What, my grandfather asked, do they say?

They say that people who live next to waterfalls don't hear the water.

They say that?

They do. Of course, your great-great-great-grandmother was right. It was terrible at first. We couldn't stand to be in the house for more than a few hours at a time. The first two weeks were filled with nights of intermittent sleep and quarreling for the sake of being heard over the water. We fought so much just to remind ourselves that we were in love, and not in hate.

But the next weeks were a little better. It was possible to sleep a few good hours each night and eat in only mild discomfort. Your great-great-great-grandmother still cursed the water (whose personfication had become anatomically refined), but less frequently, and with less fury. Her attacks on me also quieted. It's your fault, she would say. You wanted to live here.

Life continued, as life continues, and time passed, as time passes, and after a little more than two months: Do you hear that? I asked her on one of the rare mornings we sat at the table together. Hear it? I put down my coffee and rose from my chair. You hear that thing?

What thing? she asked.

Exactly! I said, running outside to pump my fist at the waterfall. Exactly!

We danced, throwing handfuls of water in the air, hearing nothing at all. We alternated hugs of forgiveness and shouts of human triumph at the water. Who wins the day? Who wins the day, waterfall? We do! We do!

And this is what living next to a waterfall is like, Safran. Every widow wakes one morning, perhaps after years of pure and unwavering grieving, to realize she slept a good night's sleep, and will be able to eat breakfast, and doesn't hear her husband's ghost all the time, but only some of the time Her grief is replaced with a useful sadness. Every parent who loses a child finds a way to laugh again. The timbre begins to fade. The edge dulls. The hurt lessens. Every love is carved from loss. Mine was. Yours is. Your great-great-great-grandchildren's will be. But we learn to live in that love.

*

Everything is Illuminated: by Jonathan Safran Foer

2011-09-19T20:23:00.001+08:00

You and I got something but it's all and then it's nothing to me.
YEAH.

2011-09-17T11:21:00.003+08:00

Gun to my head, favouritest song in the world.

Candle on my cake, courage for the week that lies ahead.

http://youtu.be/tFmt2Y3nNDk

2011-09-11T21:10:00.000+08:00

I like you by Sandol Stoddard

I like you
And I know why
I like you because
You are a good person
To like
I like you because
When I tell you something special
You know it’s special
And you remember it
A long long time
You say
Remember when you told me
Something special
And both of us remember
When I think something is important
You think it’s important too
When I say something funny
You laugh
I think I’m funny and
You think I’m funny too
I like you because
You know where I’m ticklish
And you don’t tickle me there
except
Just a little tiny bit
sometimes
But if you do then I know where to tickle you too
You know how to be silly
That’s why I like you
Boy are you ever silly
I never met anybody sillier than me
till I met you
I like you because
You know when it’s time to stop being silly
Maybe day after tomorrow
Maybe never
Oops too late
It’s quarter post silly
We fool around the same way all the time
Sometimes we don’t say a word
We snurkle under fences
We spy secret places
If I am a goofus on the roofus
Hollering my head off
You are one too
If I pretend I am drowning
You pretend you are saving me
If I am getting ready to pop a paper bag
Then you are getting to jump
That’s because
You really like me
You really like me
Don’t you
And I really like you back
And you like me back
And I like you back
And that’s the way we keep on going
Every day
If you go away
then I go away too
Or if I stay home
You send me a postcard
You don’t just say
Well see you around
Some time
Bye
I like you a lot
because of that
If I go away
I send you a postcard too
And I like you because
If we go away together
And if we are in Grand Central Station
And if I get lost
then you are the one that is yelling for me
Hey where are you
Here I am
And I like you because
When I am feeling sad
You don’t always cheer me up right away
Sometimes it is better to be sad
You can’t stand the others being so googly and gaggly
every single minute
You want to think about things
It takes time
I like you because if I am mad at you
Then you are mad at me too
It’s awful when the other person isn’t
They are so nice and hoo-hoo you could just about
punch them in the nose
I like you because if I think I am going to
throw up then you are really sorry
You don’t just pretend you are busy looking at
the birdies and all that
You say maybe it was something you ate
You say same thing happened to me one time
And the same thing did
If you find two four-leaf clovers
You give me one
If I find four
I give you two
If we only find three
We keep on looking
Sometimes we have good luck
And sometimes we don’t
If I break my arm and
If you break your arm too
Then it is fun to have a broken arm
I tell you about mine
You tell me about yours
We are both sorry
We write our names and draw pictures
We show everybody and they wish they had a broken arm too
I like you because
I don’t know why but
Everything that happens
Is nicer with you
I can’t remember when I didn’t like you
It must have been lonesome then
I like you because because
I forget why I like you
But I do
So many reasons
On the Fourth of July I like you because
It’s the Fourth of July
On the Fifth of July
I like you too
If you and I had some drums
And some horns and some horses
If we had some hats and some
Flags and some fire-engines
We could be a HOLIDAY
We could be a CELEBRATION
We could be a WHOLE PARADE
See what I mean?
Even if it was the
nine-hundred-and-ninety-ninth of July
Even if it was August
Even if it was way down at the bottom of November
Even if it was no place particular in January
I would go on choosing you
And you would go on choosing me
Over and over again
That’s how it would happen every time
I don’t know why
I guess I don’t know why I like you really
Why do I like you
I guess I just like you
I guess I just like you
Because I like you

I do not think that a song happier than this one exists :):)

He builds a rocket to fly to Tokyo :O! What's not to love?

2011-09-03T11:58:00.001+08:00

Found this little drama boy while channel surfing.
frameborder="0" allowfullscreen>

Awesome first line.

2011-08-27T23:42:00.003+08:00

"let's go off my love, run off into a large city, just the two of us. we'll live in a flat together, go to weekend markets, listen to gigs sitting down among the standing crowd, explore the world, meet a curly-haired musician at the corner of the street, walk hand in hand in the sunset, take pictures year after year of us smiling brilliantly together, run around in the snow - probably with me having to lend you clothes. you're amazing you know that? everything makes sense.. you to me, me to you. and the world to us. i wish it was now 2014. i wanna run away with you now."

It's a date <3 :)

By the way, I'm so glad we didn't consider ourselves too old for this madness:

*

2011-08-06T22:25:00.001+08:00

I don't hear music anymore, my ears are tired of all the pictures in the words cause you are in them, still.

2011-07-30T22:09:00.012+08:00

He's so incredibly musical.

Emokid88. Still don't know why this song's titled "With Me".

Hee hee :)

2011-07-14T21:15:00.003+08:00

I: THANK YOUG, THANK YOUf, THANK YOUf! :)

II: May my taste in music remain impeccable forevermore.

2011-07-02T14:39:00.003+08:00

Warm up questions
Let down
Last chicken pie
SETtlers
We won We won!
Asian mermaid/Besos

2011-06-29T23:42:00.000+08:00

2011-05-01T23:05:00.003+08:00

Please please please let me get all these things right!

2011-04-30T14:23:00.001+08:00

So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.

There is a feeling that I had Friday night after the homecoming game that I don't know if I will ever be able to describe except to say that it is warm. Sam and Patrick drove me to the party that night, and I sat in the middle of Sam's pickup truck. Sam loves her pickup truck because i think it reminds her of her dad. The feeling i had happened when Sam told Parick to find a station on the radio. And he kept getting commercials. And commercials. And a really bad song about love that had the word "baby" in it. And then more commercials. And finally he found this really amazing song about this boy, and we all go quiet. Sam tapped her hand on the steering wheel. Patrick held his hand outside the car and made air waves. And I just sat between them. After the song finished, I said something. "I feel infinite." And Sam and Patrick looked at me like I said the greatest thing they ever heard. Because the song was that great and because we all really paid attention to it. Five minutes of a lifetime were truly spent, and we felt young in a good way. I have since bought the record, and I would tell you what it was, but truthfully, it's not the same unless you're driving to your first real party, and you're sitting in the middle seat of a pickup with two nice people when it starts to rain.

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Chops"
because that was the name of his dog
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and a gold star
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door
and read it to his aunts
That was the year that Father Tracy
took all the kids to the zoo
And he let them sing on the bus
And his little sister was born
with tiny toenails and no hair
And his mother and father kissed a lot
And the girl around the corner sent him a
valentine signed with a row of X's
and he had to ask his father what the X's meant
And his father always tucked him in bed at night
And was always there to do it

Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Autumn"
because that was the name of the season
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and asked him to write more clearly
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because of its new paint
And the kids told him
that Father Tracy smoked cigars
And left butts on the pews
And sometimes they would burn holes
That was the year his sister got glasses
with thick lenses and black frames
And the girl around the corner laughed
when he asked her to go see Santa Claus
And the kids told him why
his mother and father kissed a lot
And his father never tucked him in bed at night
And his father got mad
when he cried for him to do it.

Once on a paper torn from his notebook
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Innocence: A Question"
because that was the question about his girl
And that's what it was all about
And his professor gave him an A
and a strange steady look
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because he never showed her
That was the year that Father Tracy died
And he forgot how the end
of the Apostle's Creed went
And he caught his sister making out on the back porch
And his mother and father never kissed
or even talked
And the girl around the corner
wore too much makeup
That made him cough when he kissed her
but he kissed her anyway
because that was the thing to do
And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed
his father snoring soundly

That's why on the back of a brown paper bag
he tried another poem
And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"
Because that's what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
And he hung it on the bathroom door
because this time he didn't think
he could reach the kitchen.

I guess what I'm saying is that this all feels very familiar. But it's not mine to be familiar about. I just know that another kid has felt this. This one time when it's peaceful outside, and you're seeing things move, and you don't want to, and everyone is aleep. And all the books you've read have been read by other people. And all the songs you've loved have been heard by other people. And that girl that's pretty to you is pretty to other people. And you know that if you looked at these facts when you were happy, you would feel great because you are describing "unity." It's like when you are excited about a girl and you see a couple holding hands, and you feel so happy for them. And other times you see the same couple, and they make you so mad. And all you want is to always feel happy for them because you know that if you do, then it means that you're happy too.

The perks of being aa wallflower - Stephen Chbosky.

2011-04-08T22:30:00.001+08:00

TFTM <3

2011-04-07T08:11:00.001+08:00

LIGHT UP LIGHT UP!

2011-04-04T11:32:00.003+08:00

:) <3

Fighting (the lethal kind) classes in July! Nevah again MOO HA HA HA!

2011-03-28T01:36:00.000+08:00

2011-03-26T12:07:00.002+08:00

77 times

2011-03-23T22:25:00.000+08:00

FORTITUDE!

I do so love boy bands. And geeks.

That is all.

2011-03-21T16:29:00.002+08:00

Hi, does anyone need help? Email me - yiming_pigleedoo@hotmail.com. I promise to reply.

2011-03-19T23:49:00.001+08:00

Oh Michael. Oh Chris.

2011-03-18T23:58:00.001+08:00

Suspend your disbelief!

2011-03-07T23:23:00.000+08:00

There were dance marathons during the Great Depression.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQOIJDE3RhA

2011-03-02T22:37:00.002+08:00

We are the ever-living ghost of what once was

2011-02-21T09:43:00.005+08:00

That may be all I need.

Every morning is Sunday Morning! :D Love this kickass goodfeel version!

Mappy mirthday monkey :)

2011-02-11T23:25:00.007+08:00

Oh it's the best thing that you ever had,
The best thing that you ever, ever had.
It's the best thing that you ever had,
The best thing you ever had has gone away.

So I woke up today with these lines in my head and I knew then that the dream I had just exited looked a little like this:

Alright that is my last word here on the Fer saga. I shall continue being hopelessly silly and sentimental in private.

2011-02-07T22:12:00.002+08:00

How many special people change? How many lives are living strange?

2011-02-06T22:29:00.000+08:00

I live for days like this. :) It is difficult to feel jaded when you know that the best days are better than you could ever imagine.

2011-02-04T22:24:00.002+08:00

Where I go to find you

This song is everything.

What's with the angel
and what's with the devil
They keep swapping shoulders
I can't tell which from which
"Will you be my Kris Kindle?
Will you be my better nature?"
says one to the other
But I think they're only showing off

I caught them playing poker
and I think it was the devil who said
"I'll see your heart
and I'll raise you mine"

Yeah they keep swapping shoulders
I think there's something going on
"Will you be my sweet pea?
Will you be the card up my sleeve?"
says one to the other
and this time they hold their gaze
for too long

And now they're playing poker
This time it's the angel who says
"I'll see your heart
and I'll raise you mine"

This is the story of the angel
who played poker with the devil
in the Garden of Eden
before it all went pear shaped

They said
"I'll see your heart
and I'll raise you mine"

I'll See Your heart And Raise You Mine: Bell X1.

Hey, "Happy Songs" ∩s with "Songs I Like" after all! It is good to know that Lisa Hannigan has not spent so much time with Damien Rice that she has forgotten how to smile. "Your lips come as some surprise, that they would want to come and meet mine." Lazy to type out the rest but you get the idea, it's a bundle of very cute stuff :)

David Kaplan, Orion over Lauerzersee, Switzerland.

I know where I want to go next, outer space! I am just waiting waiting waiting for my rocket to land.

2011-02-02T22:07:00.007+08:00

Alright the truth is I am bitter, it is difficult not to be. No matter how logical this outcome is (a reluctant player forced to stay is not an ideal situation for the player or the club), no matter how many barnacles of cynicism have attached themselves on me over the past few years (everyone can be bought), no matter how this is far from something new (players come and go, that is football), I still want to shake him and yell, what of being a Liverpool fan from childhood, what of the YNWA captain's armband at Atletico, what of the unsolicited promise given to all the fans right from the start ("I'll never play for another club")? PFFFT. And the additional, gratuitous parting shot (I am finally playing for a top club) was so uncool. Why does this feel like a bad break up made worse by the prospect of your ex parading with his new UGLY girlfriendS every weekend across your tv screen for 2 hours? Rage. Need... beautiful... things... now.
I still hope you get everything you wanted out of this transfer <3

This will do.

I don't fully get the electronica half of The Postal Service, so here is the indie half. As is usual with B.G., lyrics are !!! and must be honoured in full here.

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned. I have to speculate that God himself did make us into corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces from the clay. True, it may seem like a stretch, but it's thoughts like this that catch my troubled head when you're away, when I am missing you to death. When you are out there on the road for several weeks of shows and when you scan the radio, I hope this song will guide you home. // They will see us waving from such great heights, "come down now," they'll say. But everything looks perfect from far away. "Come down now," but we'll stay. // I tried my best to leave this all on your machine but the persistent beep it sounded thin upon listening. That frankly will not fly. You will hear the shrillest highs and lowest lows with the windows down when this is guiding you home. Such great heights: The Postal Service.

2011-02-01T09:59:00.002+08:00

No matter how inevitable it is, no matter how long you've had to prep yourself, goodbye always hurts some. All the best freckles. Off to drown in S Club.

2011-01-27T23:07:00.005+08:00

"On the count of 2..."

2011-01-16T22:51:00.003+08:00

Overworked PUB intern might have confused Prozac with fluoride, for THERE ARE SOME SERIOUS DRUGS IN MY WATER. :D is inadequate, :!!! more like! Ecstasy overload, coherence nil.

In short, here are all my teeth and absolutely none of my chinese eyes.

Smooth lounge dances out.

2011-01-15T18:48:00.003+08:00

www.kiva.com

2011-01-12T10:10:00.003+08:00

Let it be known to my old self that stumbles on these entries (if blogger doesn't do a diary-x on me) that yesterday was pretty damn close to perfect. I would be hard pressed to find people that get me like you guys do. It hit me while I was bathing - wasn't Eureka also born out of a bath? - that you all have spoilt me for other people. With scrw, I needn't finish my sentence, I needn't start it, hell sometimes I don't even need to think it. In comparison, being with others just requires too much work, what with the explaining and background and introduction. But I try because someone reminded me I am not an island.

It has been an extraordinarily long time since I've been to Melbourne, but the powers that be have flown Laneway Festival to Singapore, to me. Someone powerful and rich and important must love me! Can't believe I get to see THIS unfolding before my very eyes in my lifetime! :D

2011-01-09T00:20:00.002+08:00

Sometimes it feels like it was yesterday and sometimes it feels like someone else’s memory.

The sweet things - when do they come?

2011-01-02T22:08:00.002+08:00

Turn up the volume,

and then Go.

MMMM :)

2010-12-31T23:12:00.003+08:00

Sometimes with tears, sometimes with smiles, and sometimes with intermingled smiles and tears (Nathanie Hawthorne to Sophia Peabody)

Serious resolution: Be better!, that is to say be loving, kind, understanding, giving, spirited, courageous, patient, an accurate judge, hungry, passionate, playful, curious, romantic, a clean and strong fighter, clear-headed, precise, healing, peaceful, quiet, friendly, natural, gracious, generous, intelligent, beautiful, joyful. Somewhat in that order (aye so much for precision).

I want to always be there for all of you.

Just for laughs resolution: Be a (melody) composer-pianist in a rock band which has enough of a following to sell out small clubs. Or a professional fighter.

HAPPY NEW YEAR SWEETIES :)

2010-12-25T11:21:00.000+08:00

Someday soon we all will be together

2010-12-24T17:42:00.001+08:00

Home for good :)

1) Songs

a) Center of Attention: Jackson Waters (bonus track version)

b) At This Moment: Michael Buble

2) Videos

From our SYTYCD marathon:
a) Recipe for alphabet soup
1x Kent (alternatively mix 0.5x Fabian Hambuechen with 0.5x Ole Gunnar Solskjaer in very large bowl) <3
1x Neil <3<3
1x Travis <3<3<3
Kent + Neil + Travis = I cannot even begin to.. OJFIAESOGJOIGJ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BcpJ-9a40

b) Nobody can resist What is 'technique'? I am just going to do my own thang Ivan and sweet Allison. This song has such a delicious beat, I am surprised they don't use it more often.

c) Bench dance forever. Travis forever and then more.

From Conan, demi-god if you will:

3) A few words
Merry Christmas sweethearts. Right now I bid your computer grow arms and give you the tightest squeeze you can manage without suffocating <3 :)

Aaand yeah I think that maketh a blog post around here. To a delightful year ahead :D

2010-12-05T21:47:00.001+08:00

The inventors of harmony in parallel thirds.

Ok fly by!

2010-12-05T15:14:00.001+08:00

You now have enough of me to last 6 days.

2010-12-01T23:33:00.003+08:00

THE FRIENDS ARE HOMEWARD-BOUND! LET REAL LIFE BEGIN! :D (Guys, seriously, long distance smsing me to brag while Bono is blowing your minds? Not classy.)

I must share with you a most useful thing I learned in London: the humble thumbs-up. It's infinitely versatile - you can use it in, really, any situation. In particular, when you don't have an answer or don't want to come up with one, it's the perfect response no one can argue with. It doesn't really mean anything, yet somehow everyone walks away happy. All in a day, I thumbs-upped the Citibank credit card promoter, I thumbs-upped the stubborn old shaky-legged lady in the bus, and I thumbs-upped my but-her-heart-is-in-the-right-place corporate governance professor. Holla, use the THUMBS-UP today.

Now when I hear this song, all I want to do is... (well, you can't really say anything online anymore) eat a himym sandwich. Damn you Home at the End of the World and all your bad influence.

2010-12-01T23:27:00.003+08:00

dive for dreams
or a slogan may topple you
(trees are their roots
and wind is wind)
trust your heart
if the seas catch fire
(and live by love
though the stars walk backward)
honour the past
but welcome the future
(and dance your death
away at the wedding)
never mind a world
with its villains or heroes
(for good likes girls
and tomorrow and the earth)
in spite of everything
which breathes and moves, since Doom
(with white longest hands
neating each crease)
will smooth entirely our minds
-before leaving my room
i turn, and (stooping
through the morning) kiss
this pillow, dear
where our heads lived and were.

- dive for dreams, by (you know it) edward estlin cummings.

2010-11-30T18:11:00.002+08:00

The mood is good, the weather is a hug and the air is the stuff of magic. I'm feeling like a Hawaiian dance to this song at a luau with Ronel Trias :D

2010-11-30T07:14:00.003+08:00

You know your priorities are in the right place when you wake up on the morning of your exam and your first and pretty much only thought is: El Clasico! Wait for me Barcelona, imma be back, and this time I'm not going to watch the match from a tv in a restaurant.

2010-11-29T22:03:00.001+08:00

I watched home at the end of the world, like you wanted me to. I know, two and a half years after you wanted me to. But now I know why. It's lovely, Michael Cunningham always is. As are you, ilu like in secondary school.

2010-11-28T22:36:00.001+08:00

Distract me.

2010-11-24T22:31:00.001+08:00

For blue-hoo skies

Hunny,
How's your halo?
Just between you and I,
You and me and the satellites.

2010-11-24T00:22:00.001+08:00

Help!

2010-11-23T00:22:00.005+08:00

Thanks friends, for continuously tempting me to go out and play. No, really I mean it. I'm happy even if it means I have to sleep a little past my bedtime at 12 or 1. I'll just treat it as practice for practice :)

And Cesc Fabregas is not hot. GOT STAMPS IN YOUR EYES IS IT? Oh how I love primary school boys insults.

2010-11-21T23:13:00.001+08:00

DUM DADA DUM DADUM (= Well done, you have just delivered a major ass whooping to your brother's Snake high score / Your pie is mindblowing)! :DDD

2010-11-21T11:45:00.000+08:00

I WANT PIE!

2010-11-21T09:53:00.003+08:00

There will be one day a month where I will feel really sad and I guess today's it. But I can handle that because all my :(s are peanuts and my :)s elephants. Right now I just need to wait while my good elephants chomp on my peanuts.

2010-11-20T21:20:00.005+08:00

My friends are unbelievably lovely and talented. Every day they make me want to be better. This is why you must choose very carefully who you spend your time with.

(1) Watchy, my friend made this! The song is peaches/pêches ;)

(2) Putting his tips to use, this is Alfian Sa'at, my BFF. He does not spell my name 'Ee Meng'. He is beautiful.

Some Useful Tips For Writing Your Secondary One Composition, by Alfian.

Don’t write zephyr when you mean wind. Don’t write fart when you mean break wind. Don’t write azure to describe the sky or the sea. Don’t write menacing to describe clouds or guard dogs. Don’t write plethora when you mean many. Don’t write altercation when you mean fight. Don’t write quixotic when you mean brave.

Don’ t use your finger to try achieving equal spacing between your words. Don’t be demoralized by the hidden word fool in foolscap paper. Don’t use more than three dots when you want to write your ellipses, it doesn’t mean that the more dots there are the more mysterious your sentence, nor does it mean that each dot is equivalent to the root of every hair follicle you expect to incite to horripilation. Don’t write horripilation when you mean standing on end.

Don’t make your ellipses rise and fall like the flight path of a butterfly. Don’t use three apostrophes as a quotation mark even if what is said was told by a friend of a friend. Don’t forget to use commas even if you have set the class record for holding your breath underwater.

Don’t write Suddenly at the beginning of your sentences when you want to introduce one surprise after another. Don’t write the full moon/the creaking door/the cobwebbed room/his bloodshot eyes/her cackling laugh in your horror story. Don’t write horror stories.

Don’t end with I woke up and it was all a dream. Don’t end with lying in a pool of blood your eyes growing heavy footsteps fading, which is the same thing.

Don’t write sleepy when you mean tuition. Don’t write fear when you mean forgetting to bring your PE attire to school. Don’t write jealous when you mean mummy has brought home a new baby. Don’t write longing when you mean daddy has not come home from work and you are counting the cars in the car park from the window. Don’t write loss when you mean the smell of the batik hammock stretched between mummy’s knees. Don’t write shame when you mean daddy heading straight for the bargain bin when he buys you your first pair of track shoes. Don’t write loneliness when you mean the woolly crayon scrawling in an alphabet book you once owned.

Don’t write about the saddest day of your life, unless you are able to dapple your sheet of paper with tearstains, as proof.

Don’t write about the happiest day of your life, even if this is the assigned topic, because it is possible that the experience exceeds language, your language. Don’t believe those who say write what you know, the more important thing now is to write what you have, so choose a day when you were moderately, not indescribably, happy.

Don’t assume however that your life means only the one that others have witnessed, and not the lives you have lived in your head. Don’t hesitate then to write about the hundred-balloon birthday party/the beach picnic where you swam to the horizon and touched it and swam back/the suicidal goldfish revived by water/the first prize, although it would be more convincing to the marker to say second prize, because there might be one more deserving of being first, but you are no less deserving of the happiness you feel by coming in second.

Don’t keep choosing to write the argumentative essay, again and again, unless you are certain that one day you will write fiction and find your freedom ignoring the tips above, again and again.

2010-11-19T21:07:00.005+08:00

To those with exams

To those shivering in the winter cold

To those who have trouble finding sleep

The Sandman brings good dreams by sprinkling magical sand onto the eyes of children while they sleep at night. (1) I know what you're thinking but his sand is magic so it does not hurt. (2) He is real. (3) We are children.

To those watching U2 in Australia and Lifehouse and Maroon 5 in London,

HATE YALL.

Joking laaa, love yall a bit less. :)

2010-11-16T23:04:00.001+08:00

O Happy Day!

(1) My favourite person in the whole wide world was born today! HAPPY TWENTIETH JACKY BOY! And not far down the list, Paul Scholes! Yes Boon, he is indeed THE MAN. He still is.

(2)Rachel got her ticket to Seoul, doubling -nay- infiniting/infinitivising my year-end fun! It's been far too long :D

(3) Singtel: Dear customer, your free Connecting Tone will end automatically by 21 Nov 10. Aand all my long-suffering friends organise a party (une fete, e with a party hat ^!) to celebrate the expiration of my unwelcome freebie. Now they need only suffer mine not answering the phone to the tune of 'bring-bring'!

(4) IP law has been good to me. The judges, my my, what witticisms they produce - "An example of a mark that is incapable of distinguishing is 'SOAP' for soap. The bar (pun not intended) is factual, not legal". Oh yes it was intended you cheeky judge you. It also comes easily to me. Isn't it obvious that the only and simplest way of reconciling Arsenal Football Club v Reed with Irvine v Talksport Ltd is this: Justice Laddie is plainly a Man U fan. End of legal analysis.

Pray tell, what did I do to deserve this? Because I will do it again and again :))))) Triple cartwheel with split in the air! Yibeeedeeebeeedooo I am happy like fat kid with cake!

Or like Nando with ball!

El niño para siempre, don't you ever turn el hombre on me <3

Ok going to roast in contentment, bai!

2010-11-15T07:48:00.004+08:00

Enfin! Miss Aung San Suu Kyi, enfin.

Let's go guys, we can do anything if we just keep walking. Plod plod plod.

2010-11-13T22:49:00.001+08:00

LOLLIES!

(1) In Linkin Park LLC Trade Mark Application, the applicant (no prizes for guessing) FAILED. You think? You know the joker boys you knew in primary school, secondary school and jc? Well some don't ever grow up.

(2) Skrtel admits his girlfriend is still finding it hard to distinguish between him and Liverpool's many other bald players during matches"!

(3)
The moves! I know not what to say! I shall just insert exclamation mark --> ! Ah Katy Perry, you got this one right, these were without a doubt the most fun things ever :D Wj's going to marry someone who sings Ray LaMontagne to her (oops I let the secret out). I am going to marry someone who sings Teenage Dream to me. Aiya jk la.. I think.

2010-11-11T20:46:00.002+08:00

Thank you for coming back into my life :) This is a kiddy version of RHCP's 'Dosed', but no less amazing.

Dear French

I like you and all but I am so flipping glad that I finally get rid of you tomorrow.

Love, Moi.

Exams this year are a terrible torture! To hell with a broad-based education and taking cooler non-law modules if that means having exams over one and a half months. You heard me right. Be warned, don't touch if you can't handle!

Anyway, in case you don't know, I love you! Unless I don't know who you are, then you can ask me, but it's fairly safe to presume that I do. I love human beings. They are so lovely.

2010-11-08T09:59:00.003+08:00

"Confidence was never a problem" <3

2010-11-07T23:21:00.003+08:00

I dedicate tonight to Oasis because there shouldn't be a need for any reason at all to pay tribute to the second best band ever. Ever.

I am obsessed with this song, almost as much as I am with Jeff Buckley's Hallelujah. Now that I've heard every existing version of the latter, I am on a major Don't Look Back in Anger hunt. Isn't everything about this song just perfect? I wonder if the lyrics which I did not scrawl on my RJ classroom wall are still there. Feel free to join in at the chorus? Haha who is he kidding? But then again, NOEL ONLY GAVE YOU LICENCE TO OPEN YOUR MOUTHS AT THE CHORUS, HOW DARE YOU DEFY HIM, CROWD!

If you put a gun to my head I will say that Noel is my favourite. He is the musician, he is John Lennon. In the video he shows more emotion in the duration of one song than some people will experience all their lives. Liam merely sings, which is to making music as running is to swimming, as freestyle is to breakstroke, as Brendan Hansen's breastroke is to Kosuke Kitajim's breastroke. And he was the better singer only at the start; even that went downhill after Patsy Kensit apparently took, together with his heart, his voice. This is my favourite video to cite as proof of that.

I half wish they would take this video (and all those with Liam singing in 2002) down because it is why I will always be 0.001% embarrassed to say that I am an Oasis fan. With this out of the way, I will declare more freely and loudly. Anyway listen to how strong Noel's vocals are (Don't BE scared/I'm NOT scared!), especially in comparison with those of his brother, Kermit. It's such a pity really, because Stop Crying Your Heart Out is MINDBLOWING.

This next one is hilarious. Noel is SUPERMAN ok, to have been able to survive the multiple grievous wounds inflicted on him by Liam's eyes for the entire first minute! Apparently Noel had just chided Liam before they went on stage: "Did you ever see the Beatles wear shorts to perform"? Liam's response: DIE DIE DIE.

Oh my heart is already very fond, so it is high time you guys return from your temporary state of disbandment.

2010-11-06T23:26:00.000+08:00

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

When did we first encounter this? I loved it then and I love it more now because, amongst other obvious reasons, I have a very stinky memory. Never take it personally if I fail to remember you or a moment we shared. Even if I love you like I love this passage, every day father time appropriates from me, and eventually I lose even that which I hold the dearest.

I must re-read this often and check on my progress. For now: I work less and less, I avoid telling the truth very often but because I close to never lie, everyone knows that, which helps with the third, and every day I look for someone to love. (Re)Enjoy! :)

---
Written by Adrian Tan, author of The Teenage Textbook (1988), was the guest-of-honour at a recent NTU convocation ceremony. This was his speech to the graduating class of 2008.

I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that “Learning is a lifelong process” and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term “Karoshi”, which means death from overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are “making a living”. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan “Arbeit macht frei” was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.

You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

2010-10-29T22:49:00.002+08:00

It's funny how:

(1) It is utterly ridiculous that Christmas has come to Starbucks in October, yet this makes me almost as happy as Christmas day itself.

(2) Immediately after the SGX-ASX proposed merger was announced, SGX began trending on Yahoo! About 1.5 weeks later, the Aussies finally get off their surfboards to put ASX on that list (but still a few places behind SGX).

(3) I am dreading the end of this semester because I will miss my classmates so awfully much, when I would have given just about anything to skip the whole thing at the beginning.

(4) Sad songs are so alluring. Don't click if you don't think you can deal!!

2010-10-25T09:18:00.003+08:00

Commentator: Liverpool has got this certain swagger about them now. What a lovely start to the day. Why yes, I would love to swagger with you, Torres.

2010-10-24T08:35:00.001+08:00

HAHAHA OH IS IT? IS THAT SO. OIC OIC. ;)

2010-10-23T21:51:00.002+08:00

What does it mean to be "in a funk"? I think I might be in one a little bit. It's the first Saturday in 9 weeks that I'm home because I planned to do some work but nothing happened there. I sat here and I stared at my to-do list urgently. One by one the items jiggle to life. They leap off the paper and they swarm around, like drugs. Panic collects in my tummy and boy oh boy is it heavy, my arms cannot come up. The monster grows like a four year old it storms rashes spills gobbles makes an UTTER MESS. Then without warning I'm there, at the eye of it all. The nightmare it chases me no more it goes over the edge, tires itself out, gets killed by its own personal nightmare etc. In its place and into place clicks a clinical safety mechanism and what it does is - - shift - - the whole scene goes, with the annoyances, nuisances, downstairs drumming, with the urgent me, so only that which is of no importance remains. Now I sit here and my to do list is on the floor no care no thing to do. A tiny thought stirs so I open my organiser and count out 9 weeks. Then again nothing. Next time I should just go out instead.

2010-10-22T23:25:00.009+08:00

I know it's a really weird thing to say, but...

(1) Nothing makes me cry like a good gospel song.

After all that I've been through, who on earth can I turn to? Wow?

(2) I need to take the time to give myself a little praise. CYM you have been more courageous than I ever could have imagined you to be. Good on you. I am never letting perceived limits hold you back again.

(3) The drafters behind the Krafting of the 98% bittersweet Cadbury Report showed a surprising amount of self-restraint in the face of a mouthwatering opportunity to severely punish would-be errant corporate governors, settling for a mere slab on the wrist instead. More? :D

2010-10-14T23:07:00.000+08:00

I do not mind if I die trying.

To my plentiful (fellow) emokid88 friends, here's a new song to sing-a-long to! And to those who are looking around innocently the way I was when XXX threatened to give the silent zero class participation points, YOU LIKEIT YOU LIKEIT YOU SIMPLY CAN'T RESISTIT HAHA :D (And if you did not read that deliciously rhythmic line the way it was meant to be read, go back and do it again.) Now that I've gotten that bit of crazy out of my system, it seems Adam has found Jane v 2.0, aaand the world rejoices. Which reminds me, I was complaining about HOW MUCH I hated doing assignments (I would rather eat 10 whole fishes, fried smellily, including skin and bones, while a full grown dog sniffs at my ankles, true story) when it was suggested that I should do a funny one. This suggestion merits serious consideration. Calling for corporate governance jokes, feed me a muse today! :O

Steeveegee glee! http://www.liverpoolfc.tv/video/Features/Smalltalk-with--21632.php3?plcl_autoplay=true

All the units of my love for him just got together and procreated, again and again. Kids are the more precious things on earth, keep them around you always. I love it that Stevie doesn't talk down to the kids, I think they really appreciate that.

Kid: Is Jamie Carragher your best friend?
Stevie: Yes.

Kid: Who is your favourite player?
Stevie: Growing up it was probably John Barnes. Now it's Fernando Torres.

Kid: Is Fernando Torres better than Didier Drogba?
Stevie: Yes, miles better.

Oh how you unknowingly fan the fires of billions of Gernando fans. See for example somebody on ONTD: "Why do you touch Fernando Torres like mummy touches daddy?" It was quickly agreed that this person wins the Internet.

Kid: What is your favourite Pokemon?
Stevie: ?????

Cheeky kids: Do you like Chelsea / Do you like Everton?
Stevie: No.

Kid: How many - How much - money do you earn in a year?
Stevie: A little bit.

Kid: Do I look like Ryan Babel?
Stevie: No, you're not that ugly.

Kid: Did you play with Barbie when you were young?
Stevie: No but I've been playing with them quite recently with my 2 daughters.

<3333333333333oisjgsogij!

Welcome back Aaron Ramsey, we were cheering really hard for you :)

2010-10-09T23:28:00.000+08:00

You can't rush into it. You have to be each number for a whole year.

I was listening to 'The Long and Winding Road' on Youtube when I thought to myself 'so this is it, this is the day I officially discover that I have gone perfectly mad for I swear John Lennon is peeking out from the webpage at me.'

OF COURSE IT'S 9 OCTOBER, facebook failed me on this one. Happy birthday sir. I often cannot make up my mind on questions of music, but you are by however far I can run (and for you, I will run) my favourite musician of all time. Although I will be eternally sad that - - -, I take some comfort in the fact that some Japanesey version of you remains in Sean. He has a cute puppy dog singing voice - dear idol of mine, you do realise how much I must love you to put 'cute' and 'puppy' together when thinking of your offspring, right? Happy birthday Sean!

(John fathering! Sean cleanshaven! Rufus harmonising! Unknown boy donning Al Pacino shirt! Me likey!)

MOBY!!! WHY YOU STEAL BARNEY'S CD???

2010-10-07T23:05:00.002+08:00

Glee covered 'One of Us', peepee! I still haven't fully figured that song out, but I guess it comes in handy if you really need another reason to treat people right.

2010-10-06T14:03:00.001+08:00

Today is a challenge that I will overcome.

Sing it Kanye.

2010-10-02T23:25:00.001+08:00

It's temporary, this place I'm in/ I permanently won't do this again

Enough for now. Twist?

2010-10-02T09:43:00.001+08:00

Just for the record, I hate cars and their irresponsible drivers.

2010-10-01T23:38:00.001+08:00

And you'll find, this time tomorrow, we'll decide where it will all go in this life

It's true. So many things become much clearer if you just sleep on it. Try it? <3

You did the most bizarre thing of being all smug about me leaving things behind when we were together because apparently that meant that I felt safe with you. I always thought that was nothing more than a rather cute piece of bs. Today at Starbucks I saw a kid preparing to leave with his parents. He was in the midst of running off when his mum called him back, holding up his backpack with a knowing smile. Perhaps you had sth there.

2010-09-30T22:35:00.005+08:00

I am older now, and we did it when we were young

This amazing song deserves a whole post to itself but since it will tend to bring you down a bit (the lyrics are pretty darn grave for a band they label 'punk'), you may like to counterbalance it with the following:

Oh this brings tears to my eyes, there are TEARS IN MY EYES. Bitta background: so Barney's black half-brother (they share a mum) has just reunited with his black dad, and white as paper Barney believes himself to be part of the family. Now hit play and die from pure mirth. (Btw do you guys remember that we had practised Def Leppard's Two Steps Behind for our performance on the last day of competition @ Sanya Samakki 1998, Pattaya but some old - and by old I mean in the 15-17 age group - guy decided when we were already on stage that we should do Stand By Me instead so it was just him singing and us pretending to sing from behind? Haha, good memories!)

Do the crazy Jamaican dance! Oh Bobster, where is that phone number you promised? I would have liked to chit-chat with you sometime.

Wow-wee! Why are all the people I like dead? I am eternally grateful that I am not an Australian Aborigine and not thereby barred from watching these videos.

Hee Hee Hee. Oh begone bad thoughts. I reject all thoughts on anything to do with a quick dissolution of a marriage, a creation of a new one, and me in the middle of all that. Nah, I genuinely wish (slightly) harder for Ronnie to be living happily now. Luckiest Woman Ever, unless you are in the middle of a Ronaldo picspam, you have no excuse for this. SHAME ON YOU, INGRATE. Repent, I say!

2010-09-29T23:19:00.003+08:00

Tubby's golden line to ---: I was here before you and I will be here after you. I love it and I am so wanting to use it now on YOU and YOU and YOU, MANICURED PAWZ OFF MY BUDDIES. Or, ok I guess I can wait. But don't make me wait so long guys, grr!

Pong makes the last of the Ozzies, Americanos, UKians gone. My life is really, really quiet now. Come back soon lovelies, I can't wait to do it all over again.

Happier note! I recall from one of the viral ready-to-forward e-mails we used to receive, that apparently, there is at least one person thinking of you (i.e. any one of us) (hopefully fondly) every day. Now, even in my even more idealistic and optimistic days (yes, possible la) I slightly doubted that was true. But now, I am believing it a bit more, and the fact that people have actively come forward to make that happen makes me feel like the luckiest person on Planet Urf. And Luck, Woody Allen would have you know, will take you Everywhere (here, I cross my fingers and chant 'Brazil, oh let it be Brazil!'). Insert goofy smile.

P.S. <3 What made my heart warm warm was how the pictures showed him to be such an affable captain. You don't see Chelsea players trying to even whisper in John Terry's ear.

Conan: Facebook is trying to trademark the word "Face". I am going to trademark the word "aceboo", and then wait for the dollars to roll in. CHUCKLE!

2010-09-27T23:22:00.002+08:00

Dear Jeff Buckley, what is your story? How did you reach musical nirvana? How did your range of emotions come to be deeper than the universe? Why did you go swimming in your boots in Memphis? Why your guitar so pro? Who is John Mayer? Good night dear Jeff Buckley.

2010-09-27T00:40:00.002+08:00

I'll build a stairway to paradise

1) I am so obsessed with this. I need to sign this guy now. Of course, anyone who puts Travis and Oasis together, with Don't Speak (which, incidentally, is the first present-time song I remember liking, EVER) for bonus points must possess a cheat sheet to my heart and is furiously exploiting it. But really this song stands very well on its own, redonkulous song elements notwithstanding.

(Norwegian Recylcing - Singularity)

2) Gerrard has ticklish ears too :):)

Gerrard has always, and will always, for as long as he remains at Liverpool, carry the entire team on his shoulders. Unfortunately, playing one+a few more (depending on the mood of everyone else) against 11 for several years takes its toll and it has recently become so painfully evident that he cannot do that for much longer. Liverpool's much publicised desire to focus on the EPL this season has become a joke that isn't even funny anymore. Then this fuels even more will he stay, will he go rumours (is that even possible? Surely his transfer speculation limit has been busted eons ago), which is all so tiresome and unproductive. You know what, if, for a Liverpool revival, the club needs to be stripped down to its bones and majorly revamped, then I say do it. If the more established, more expensive and most unwilling-to-stay players need to be sold, if Gerrard and Torres need to be shipped to Barcelona to make way for fresh blood, all so that LFC can make a full-on comeback, DO IT even if this means that I will have to support a mid-table team for a few seasons. I don't think that a single true fan would mind.

3) Nadav is getting married! How cool is that? Congrats buddy, treat her right :)))))

4) I will try to stop saying 'this song is great' every day. But this is really one of those special ones. Thus the frame.

I got dosed by you, and closer than most to you, and what am I s'posed to do? Take it away, I never had it anyway. Take it away and everything willl be ok. In you a star is born and, you cut a perfect form and, someone forever warm. (...)* Show love with no remorse and, climb on to your seahorse and, this ride is right on course. This is the way I wanted it to be with you. This is the way I knew that it would be with you. Dosed - Red Hot Chili Peppers.

*The first and only time I got scolded for cutting lyrics to suit my purposes, it was by Ben Cai, who gave me a lesson on respecting the integrity of songs. Now even on my blog I follow his rules.

5) Last night I couldn't sleep because I was missing people so badly. Some are long gone and will eternally leave a void in my heart (not being melodramatic), some have just left me to deal with an awkward transition, some whom I know will soon leave despite my best efforts at retaining them, some are still here, and some of those some are still reaching out to me. How I manage to miss the last group of people.. let's just call it a unique talent. I almost manageg to miss those who have yet to enter my life. So I did something about just some of them and then slept like a baby. My friends, stop sitting there thinking and feeling, and try doing something about it. Like Rufus Wainwright says: I'll build a stairway to paradise with a new step every day.

2010-09-23T23:23:00.001+08:00

Came home to some Johnny in my inbox. It is because of people like him that RG girls like us are unable to see the need for husbands.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFmt2Y3nNDk&feature=related

Everything here is so perfect. How to do anything other than 'repeatedly rape the replay button' (not my words)? SCOFF YOU PALTRY RAIN! MY EYELASHES ARE BOTHERED. UH HUH WHIP OUT SUPER-RESISTANT INSTRUMENTS! YEAH, YOU CAN'T TOUCH ME! I. AM. IVINCIBLE. SUCK. IT. UP. I love GOO :)

Btw Glee busted owt nooyork, gave the asian guy his first lines and then fielded a half cute blonde. I am officially fully won over.

2010-09-22T23:23:00.001+08:00

This song tugs at all the strings of my being, heart, ham, harp, whatnot, and makes me sad in my coriest core. Three Doors Down at this time was of Goo Goo Dolls quality. I must remember to build a time machine in my free time so that I can stick my head into the early 2000s and yell: GUYS, DO NOT DO HERE WITHOUT YOU which is awesome and all but will be the song other people will take as defining you even though you are so much better than that, and also uh it will earn you barrels of cash in which you can effectively retire, revel and roast fat, and I'll be .. here without you.

He spent his whole life being too young
To live the life that's in his dreams
At night he lies awake and he wonders
Why can't that be me
Cos in his life he's filled with all these good intentions
He's left a lot of things he'd rather not mention right now
Just before he says good night
He looks up with a little smile at me and he says
If I could be like that
I would give anything
Just to live one day in those shoes
If I could be like that
What would I do, what would I do

For this boy who lies below Brad Arnold while doing his QT :?, a little Conan is apt. Actually, scratch that, Conan is always and unversally relevant. This gem's from his uber classy goodbye speech which is master class, even if you don't consider that it was delivered midair, while he was making pretty projectile motion lines with his flying body, after he was unceremoniously kicked off the Throne of Comedy where his ass so rightly belongs forevermore.

"All I ask of you, especially young people...is one thing. Please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism -- it's my least favourite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen."

Yes sir. That is so flipping true and helpful, they should print it out into tiny life manual booklets and place them in the hands of newborns the moment they arrive.

2010-09-22T00:03:00.002+08:00

"The chances of bumping into someone you know... I'll put it at pretty unlikely."

This is how it felt. You guys are never (gonna) let me go kazuoishiguro, are you? Thank you!

I am myself, i.e. a dork, but... also a GENIUS and so says my evidence:

Things come (crash) things go
Snip snap clipty clap tic tac
The weird world rolls on

I like it.

2010-09-20T19:55:00.001+08:00

I am sorry / Why good people die young

I never saw that as being something that needed explaning. If anything, it was an explanation itself, to the puzzle that I often pondered over: What on earth were you doing, well, on earth? It confirmed my theory that you were made an angel, but accidentally sorted into the human pile. There was nothing fallible about you, no weakness that jealousy nor pride nor rage nor evil could attch onto. Life was a learning experience you simply had no use for. You were born ready and one day when the Authorities discovered their mistake they swiftly sent you to where you should have gone directly in the first place. But while there was nothing you could learn here, there was an awful lot you could, and did, teach me. It is in times like this when I have behaved like such a lousy human being that I miss you the most, that I wish that you could have continued teaching me. And then when I think hard about it with my crappy 2%-used mortal brain, I realise that these lessons were in the completed syllabus - like you used to say, nothing said on impulse is of any good, your greatest regrets in life will be all those times you hurt those you loved, and no trust, no relationship. Also 'John Lennon's music is good shit'. Of course you were absolutely right about that as well.

2010-09-19T11:27:00.003+08:00

Try something new :)

2010-09-19T11:27:00.001+08:00

2010-09-18T11:19:00.001+08:00

LOOKY! http://www.flickr.com/photos/daffodilious/4428068621 :O

2010-09-16T22:11:00.001+08:00

I need others to tell me about myself

That is what we discovered a long time ago. Here's another illustration to add to the Rapunzel list:

"the band's [Boys Like Girls] all-around sound is geared to late '90s alternative radio rock, along the lines of Vertical Horizon, Goo Goo Dolls, and Eve 6".

DING DING DING! Ok it's not that on the muneh since BLG is waaay poppier but still, all of the 3 mentioned could well make my High Fidelity list of Top 5 'Radio Rock' Bands of the 90s. Thank you, random music reviewer, for helping me sleep better, /mystery.

Tomorrow, tomorrow! Wish me luckkkkkkk! Now that I've put so much into this, I really want to do this right (fingers crossed).

2010-09-12T23:16:00.002+08:00

Guezzwhat? Embarrassing fact of the day: I really, really enjoy Boys Like Girls! I know you want to roll your eyes and say that you already knew that. "I used to be love drunk/ But now I'm hungover/ I love you forever/ Forever is over/ Now I'm sober/ Nanananananananana"? TOO MUCH FUN HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHELLO NEW WEEK

(If your taste is as suspect and -gasp!- plebian (5m, not chris brown but not bad at all) as mine!)

2010-09-10T17:46:00.003+08:00

I can't believe how nicely everything is falling back into place for me. Life will never ever be the same but I'm starting to lead a comfortable one parallel to the one before :) So I really did just have to wait faithfully and let you do the rest. Wow.

French test this week! Yes I am taking it very seriously! Yes I am taking it too seriously! Yes it is driving me a la folie. Yes that's probably not the right way to use that phrase!

Because crazy people read this, NEVER BURN. ALWAYS BUILD!!!

2010-09-04T09:05:00.011+08:00

Je voudrais...
There is nothing like a little Otis Redding (in recording, not live, form) on a cool Saturday morning. He really helps to smooth out the rough edges of the past week.

This one really grows on you. I usually like my love songs epic and emo, so I thought nothing of it at first, but Monsieur Otis (like a gangster) shows us that a subtle, understated one can be quite something too, if placed in the hands of a master song-builder.

Two things trouble me. Too many French lessons are beginning to corrupt my English (mainly, 'at' for 'in', a chain of 'of.. of.. of..' for the simpler ''s'). Also, too many people continue to lead their lives unaware of the existence of my motivation to learn French. It is a crime to live on this beautiful earth and not know about all the things that make it beautiful, so educate yourselves little people, and type 'Yoann Gourcuff' into any good web search engine. I daresay life will get considerably more enjoyable after.

As a rosy-cheeked angel cherry on top of the sundae of smouldery yummyness that is Yoann, there is the precious Jean Baptiste Maunier, which you will remember from Les Choristes. For maximum viewing pleasure of the video below, kindly ignore Clemence, the French Mandy Moore (for breathiness) or Miley Cyrus (for a tenuous and I hope daily plummeting bit of legitimacy borrowed from her famous father, who composed the concerto pour deux voix. Ya VOIX not SOUFFLES, Clemence!) Why 'singing' beside JBM Paragon of Purity is not be the last place on earth she would ever want to find herself, baffles me. When they get on the singing see-saw, the array of flaws in her voice leaps out at you and does an elaborate chinese dance, complete with trailing flailing arms.

To complete the trinity! I don't know why it's taken me so long to find the video version of the song in my birthay disc.

My favourite rock anthem + my favourite rock group of my time + playing in their hometown + the crowd singing the words like their lives depended on it + crowd drowning out Liam's post-02 kermit-like voice + Noel's guitar solo!!! HELLO? CAN CRY FROM THE AWESOMENESS OF IT ALL OK. Je voudrais the comeback of Oasis. I spend my whole life waiting for miracles to happen, and sometimes they really do (Instanbul 05!), so I know it's always well worth the wait. I wil put my life in the hands of a rock n roll band, Noel, and I don't care that they'll throw it all away.

2010-08-30T20:44:00.004+08:00

Being good

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.

- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Whenever I am at a loss as to what to do, I take a cue from you, from your love, and just try my best to do what is right, to love as you do. Thanks for being one of the last few things that I am sure about. Thanks for letting me know in all your wonderful ways that no matter how bad things get, that everything is going to be alright.

2010-08-26T21:28:00.007+08:00

I have so much to be thankful for

It is complete madness. No matter where and when I look, I am Pollyanna Glad. I bet it's the same for you. If you can't see it, I'll be happy to point it out. Seriously, hit me.

In other news, 'Dreamy Creamies':
is the product of thinking about IP law while listening to Joshua Radin's 'Sky'.
is what I fully intend to name the one big thing I will create in this life, whether it turns out to be a dessert or my Dream XI FC. O Law of Passing Off won't you descend upon me and my soon-to-be multibillion dollar business of Dreamy Creamy selling your protective shield.

Choo, out (pronounced 'oat' in Canadian)! I AM A SCHOLAR OF MANY LANGUAGES THX. A right poly-gloat heeheehawhaw.

2010-08-15T11:34:00.005+08:00

Last troubled night I woke up so abruptedly that I found myself in the sitting up position. The 4 big bright red letters flashing in my head were ADHD. There you go wj, my brain is that lag. Don't know which caused which but woke up this morning feeling very itchy and restless. I blame swimming weekend warrior style. Need to blast chill music, scream the lyrics impassionedly and dance crazy 80's dance until finally tired. Use your joshua radin cd.

2010-08-14T11:31:00.012+08:00

One red paperclip: what really happened

(Last night, I was wandering about the Department of Nice Stories, My Own Head, furiously throwing files and papers in the air, determined to find a real good story to use as a pre-emptive strike against Rachel's looming nightmare when I stumbled upon this. Believe me, I tried so hard to tell the story properly but, as usual, failed epically. Seriously, not only do I manage to make the most incredibly amazing things sound dull and unexceptional, I mess up all the facts along the way. I've known for awhile with this sad sense of helpless inevitability that my poor memory will eventually be my undoing, but at least my Subconscious has sort of wisened up to this, and it duly nagged me all the way home and throughout my sleep. So now I have to try to do this story justice if only to shut it up.)

Meet Kyle, who at the beginning of the story was NOT HOMELESS (he rented a house) and his one red paper clip NOT LONGER THAN HIS ARM and NOT HIS ONLY POSSESSION (recall lease and as you will come to see, a healthy, unbridled imagination). Kyle went online and told the world about his plan to trade this one red paper clip for something bigger or better and to keep trading up until he got a house. He accomplished this exactly one year and 14 trades later, and now lives in the two storied house in Kipling, Saskatchewan (incidentally the inspiration for much of our Consumer (Fair Protection) Act and also the reason for my genuine fear that I would burst out laughing midway through my lawr moots) that he traded for.

This is how the clip mighty morphin power rangered into a house:
One red paper clip
Novelty pen
Ceramic doorknob
Camping stove
1,000-watt generator
Beer keg with neon sign
Snowmobile
Trip to Yakh
A large van
One recording contract
One year rent-free in Phoenix
Afternoon with Alice Cooper (rock star)
Motorised KISS snow globe with mult-coloured lights
Hollywood movie role
House in Kipling

This list is just like one of those old lady/young lady, is it a tree or is that a face pictures in chain e-mails or psychologist offices. Depending on who's looking at it, different trades seem iffy, or even clearly not bigger and not better. For instance, I would not prefer a fish-shaped pen to the mega paper clip (I once bought a fifteen cm hair clip which made me very happy but otherwise had no conceivable use/value) or a doorknob to a pen (What could one possibly do with a doorknob detached from its door?), and then there are probably the more obvious head-scratchers - beer keg for generator, rent free apartment for a year vs afternoon with someone whose identity must be explained in parentheses, and then wth, a SNOW GLOBE? What was he thinking? I fully expect that to be n rather than two trades away from a house, really.

Anyhoo, I really like what this story stands for: (a) Possibility - Growing up, one of the greatest lessons that I have learnt (at home, in school, from various events/inventions/discoveries around the world, from general postmodern ideas) is that in this day and age, the size of the realm of possibility is enormous, and that it keeps expanding exponentially as people tirelessly chip away at the stumbling block of impossibility. Kyle succeeded because he had a good idea, the Internet and an interested media, all of which are easily within many people's reach. (b) Kindness - The rules of the game were clearly stated from the start: give me something bigger or better than what I have, and many came voluntarily to offer to do just that. So don't ever tell me that there are no more good people in this big bad self-interested world. (c) Relative value - One girl's pounding migraine could well be 75 million headbanging people's Ga-ga Ro-ma-ma favourite on youtube . Kyle was lucky to have met the No.1 Collector of Snowglobes; if he had been luckier, he would have met the No.1 Fan of Mega Red Paper Clips and gotten to the finish line much quicker.

So my dear scrw, never think that it is out of your means to make things better, trust that goodness exists and I will get back to you when I can think of an application for the third lesson.

2010-08-12T11:34:00.015+08:00

Letters

Dear Rio
Today when I was in the shower, I thought of something which was admittedly only about a 3 on the haha scale, yet I did a full-blown chuckle to myself for a bit. I hope you saw that :)

Dear Jim
Where are you? What are you doing now? I am so used to being the uncontactable one in all of my human relationships, I am at a loss now that you are MIA. I mean, I know roughly that you are in the Arctic tagging fish, stabilising icebergs, hugging Andy the polar bear's longlost relatives and generally saving my grandchildren's world but that's all. I hope that either the internet contraption you guys set up on that mountain collapsed, or that the aurora borealis is being all angsty on your wireless again, or that you are too busy living your exciting life or that you've just grown tired of writing me.. as long as you are warm and safe! Because of you I now look out in the papers for reports on Arctic explorers / Canadian-American environmental navy groups. I miss you and your poems and pictures, your sweetness and your particular brand of humo(u)r. I'll always be waiting.

Dear Rachel

Do you remember what I do of this song? Hmm, of course you don't. It was what I looped on my ipod one day long long ago when we were running at east coast. I didn't want to be the first one to stop the two of us, so I kept telling myself that I would only stop when the song stopped playing. Now when I think about it, that day seems so surreal and dreamlike, I almost doubt if it happened at all. For starters, we were running, that in itself is enough to make it a suspicious memory. And then there's more! We were advancing at an admirable pace for such an incredible distance, you were not shielding your face from the sun and we had a proper, orchestra-building-like sunrise. These days the sky just brightens abruptly and without warning the new day is foisted on us all. Something like that day will never happen again but I'm so glad it did once :D

2010-08-10T18:14:00.008+08:00

Today in my head

I am wet and late and panting up the - i swear - growing hill. FLIPPING FISH AND ALL THINGS EFFITY! I settle into the steady rhythm of mindless IE browsing against the background of Ng-Loy. She oscillates her wand, sending wave after wave of information towards us. Okay this is not so bad. I yell at shiiingz. Shiiingz yells back at me, figuring that the best defence is offence. She is right. Sneaky. I could get used to this. Then a whole succession and I mean succession of delightful things follow :D

I love the old skool feel to this song, which is rare. The only old things I like are the Beatles and my grandfather.

2010-08-09T16:22:00.014+08:00

Vacation/Vacances!
Add sleeplessness, solitude and silence (thank you Bose QC, my new baby :D!) to a plane home and you get the perfect mix for a full session of thinking (too much, as pong would say, but nah I still believe more good than bad comes out of thinking). In my head, I fastflipped the part of the book of my life beginning from my last trip to hong kong in 07 to today, riding a whole rainbow of emotions in the process, and then I thought about the meaning of new events. Somehow, some way - maybe because the good old classic me is still solidly anchored in my core - I ended up being hopeful, optimistic and so impatient for the plane to land, for the rest of my life to begin and for that impossible thumb print machine to welcome me home. I would rather not need anything in life but I appreciate how good a holiday always is for me.

It's chocolat for now. Who knows what it'll be by the end of the semester (I promise to do my best to document everything)? I sense great things coming... and by that I do not mean the new Taylor Swift song on radio which is of course really an old Taylor Swift song, no effort at disguise at all. She is officially the new 50 Cent in terms of self-passing off. C'mon you have got to give the listening public more credit than that. I do know an apple is an apple is an apple.

VAMPIRE WEEKEND IN SINGAPORE GUYS, GO GO GO. Disclaimer: I was not paid to advertise this event, nor did I receive any benefits, say in the form of free concert tickets, hint fully intended.

2010-08-01T23:41:00.008+08:00

Mr. Nobody

Because I need shows to resemble real life and real people as much as they possibly can, I hate! cartoons (sorry Pixar, your colourful balloons win over the whole world minus me) and guzhuang shows. Usually, I hate sci fi with a vengeance fierce enough to scare the whole genre into withdrawing into non-existence. But oh, Mr. Nobody is just special somehow. I have no idea how to put it into words, it is difficult in the same way that 'talking about music is like dancing about architecture', but I'm long due for a post so I'll try. The images! You know how you come across a word so many times that you have a good guess what it means but the dictionary lies beyond the reach of even 1x ridiculously long limb (even after yout try both arm and shuffling leg) so you're never sure if you've gotten its exact meaning but one day it is demonstrated so clearly before you that you understand it immediately, perfectly and obviously, just like that. So long story short, pretty image after pretty image triggered a flashing light in my head and I think to myself that this is what people must mean when they say 'cinematography'. And the music SO FITTING that you cannot decide which was made for which (chicken, egg?) and you just want to cry the way the people did when Michaelangelo's David was unveiled. Then the story. I did not understand all of it and I disagree with the conclusion that the protagonist comes to at the end but it meant something to me, which is much more than I can say for a lot of the 2 hour blocks of crap that I've sat through in this lifetime (yes I am talking about you, movie where Hillary Duff plays 2 characters, 2!!!!! warranting all those exclamation marks!) To me, it stood for this: (1) so much hinges on every little choice you make in life, so (2) it's very important that you choose right but (3) life moves in such complex ways that you can never tell what one thing will lead to and so.. nothing. You just choose and live with it. Suck thumb. Tragic, right? Plus there was some physics in it which I actually understood or at least sciency terms which I recognised from Big Bang Theory! So exciting! So maybe the secret to a well-received movie is to include intellectual yet reachable content so that it will stroke a happy audience's ego. For those who know me well enough, I will proceed to confirm that you do so know me by giving you at last what you have been waiting for: THE LITTLE BOY WHO PLAYS YOUNG NEMO IS <3<3 He puts the Home Alone boy to redfaced SHAME. He's playing young Dumbledore in the last two HP movies so guess which big money-grubbing movie-splitting company already has my happily surrendered $20 :D:D

2010-07-28T22:53:00.006+08:00

HELLO PAMELA JAZZ! TALKING TO YOU MADE MY DAY TODAY :):):)<3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GN2kpBoFs4&feature=related
is exactly what I want to tell you, urge you and then remind you. All of you. (Edit: not literally la wahlau.)

2010-07-14T23:13:00.009+08:00

"Nine; everything started 2 years and 13 days ago, scoring the goal against Germany. He made us dream, he made us believe, and for that we have won this cup. Fernando!"

FRAGILE BOY

WILL BECOME STRONG BOY AGAIN, AS WILL I!

WATCH AND LEARN, BITCHES!

Ah. gif fail.